Conversation

“The real art of
conversation is not only
to say the right thing at
the right place but to
leave unsaid the wrong
thing at the tempting
moment.”
Dorothy Nevill quotes.
......................
A gentleman knows how to carry himself in lively
conversation. A gentleman can make any person feel
at ease while talking to them. After leaving a
conversation with a gentleman, a person should feel
uplifted and edified.

Look at the person you are talking to. It is a turn off when you are
talking to someone, but they’re staring off in space. Looking at the
person shows that you are interested in what they have to say. But
be careful! Eye contact is good, but too much of a good thing is bad.
Staring someone down will only make them feel uncomfortable.

Use the person’s name when talking to them. Dale Carnegie, author
of How to Win Friends and Influence People, said that a person’s
name is the sweetest word in the whole world. People are set at ease
when they hear their own name. Take advantage of this by using it
during your conversation. This should be used with discretion. If
you use someone’s name too much, you start sounding like a used
car salesman and not a gentleman.

Forget yourself. What makes a gentleman charming? Focusing on
others instead of themselves. Ask questions about the other person
and be genuinely interested in what they have to say.

Disagree, but do it with class. In his autobiography, Benjamin
Franklin set out how he disagreed with people while still being a
gentleman:
“Use modest diffidence. Instead of saying “certainly” or “undoubtedly,”
say,
“I conceive or apprehend a thing to be so and so;
it appears to me, or I should think it so or so, for such and such
reasons; or I imagine it to be so; or it is so, if I am not mistaken.”

If you don’t know the person, introduce yourself with a smile and a
firm handshake. Don’t wait for the other person to make the first
move. A gentleman takes action. A warm smile and firm handshake
can put any person at ease.

Avoid off-color jokes and gossip.
The difference between a gentleman and a boor is class. Show you have it. A few cheap
laughs at someone else's expense will tarnish your image, both
socially and professionally.

Avoid discussing religion and politics. Such discussions almost
always lead to irritating differences of opinion and open quarrels
which leave a coolness of feeling between people. Avoid this by
sticking to less controversial topics.